what's for dinner?

I am blessed with an abundance of folks who want to know what can we do to help. This has been a difficult question to answer. First I fight pride, in which I tell myself that I can do it all (and if I had to I could). Then I hit my personal endeavor to have balance in life, even in the times of chaos. But, what do I need help with? My employers have been gracious in giving me space to take care of Joe (and I already work from home a great deal, so that helps). My in-laws, in the midst of their own chaos, have been fantastic to us, as always. Even as I type this Joe's Dad continues to work on our bathroom renovation. Friends and family have visited and come over to stay with Joe when it has been necessary for me to leave the house for work or 1 quick run to the grocery store. Which brings us to food. When each day falls into line, the only thing I really don't feel like I've been able to keep up with is food. (I think the patient is trying to make up for the 5 days in the hospital when he ate a total of about 8 chicken nuggets and a breakfast sandwich) I had a good start the first couple of days home from the hospital. But, as the days went on and I've been working more along with taking care of Joe, the house and the bathroom -having diverse and nutritious food was starting to lack. I mentioned this to one of my wonderful congregants and asked if she might have recipes or suggestions for food that I could make easily and would freeze and reheat well. I did not get any recipes or suggestions. What we have gotten is food. 

   I have been in the church my entire life. I know that when crisis hits the people of the church make casseroles. My family did it growing up. I've done it. I've seen churches across the country do it. But, in all of that, I've never been on the receiving end. I have had no idea what a truly tremendous blessing this is. To know that I can go to the freezer and not just pull out a frozen pizza or a can of soup from the cabinet, but a ready to go home cooked meal. I nearly tear up just thinking and writing about it. My husband gets the nourishment he needs to heal, while I still have time for the many extra loads of wash (thanks to night sweats..gross), cleaning, work and who knew - a few extra moments each day to just spend time with each other.

   So, as difficult as it was to ask for help. I am so deeply grateful to everyone who has given to us. I pray that everyone has a community of friends, family, coworkers, congregants that steps up to help out in times of chaos. I hope that this reminds me, that even in the busiest of 'normal' it is always possible to just make a double portion of dinner and give it to someone in need. I challenge myself (and anyone reading) to look around and see if there is someone we can give to before they even ask...new parents, recent widow, sick parent, injured spouse, single parent, family moving, lost job...how the list goes on.  I think pride might be the vain of more folks than just me, but why have community if we can't help each other?

Pride will be the death of me

We are going through a series on the 7 Deadly Sins at my church. In my research today for worship and Sunday School lessons, I took the time to take a quiz to 'discover my sin'. Here are the results.

Greed:	Low
Gluttony:	Low
Wrath:	Very Low
Sloth:	Very Low
Envy:	Very Low
Lust:	Very Low
Pride:	Medium

Take the Seven Deadly Sins Quiz

Now, I thought some of the questions were a bit extreme and so may have scored lower on this then I really struggle with any of these sins. However, I find the relative proportions that I struggle with each quite 'dead' on and very interesting. I've always been very concerned about keeping my pride, having a strong image and so forth. My interest in quite peeked to take a look at where my sense of pride crosses the line from healthy trait for a successful person to sin. In church we'll be taking this subject not from the traditional lens of Pride vs. Humility, but from the perspective of Pride vs. Confidence in God's Call on your life.

Rethink Church

I went to an event yesterday that was our conference's participation in a new campaign of the umc. The event happened in the eastern portion of my neighborhood, Oak Cliff. This part of the neighborhood is a predominately Spanish speaking population. It was noted by one of the organizers that the only English speaking folks at the event were clergy and other 'church professionals.' But, all the written materials I saw were in English, the speaking that I heard was in English. We obviously need to Rethink Church. Was it that the expected crowd of English speakers didn't turn out? Scared by the humidity or the drive into 'the hood'? I've often had to explain my living in a quite nice and quaint Oak Cliff neighborhood rather than the rough and tumble reputation my dear OC can have.
After this I went to church - to pull carpet. Lots of folks showed up to help and we had the room cleared in 30 minutes. So, I followed this with a stop at the Praise Band rehearsal. This was the moment of the day that unexpectedly rejuvenated me. I do love being at their rehearsals, but last night I was particularly uplifted by the camaraderie and music.
I want to Rethink Church, but there is still some of church now that I'd like to hang onto. Nights like yesterday for one. But, then again even last night could be better. What if rehearsal was open? What if other people got to experience the fellowship and music making processes that I get to when I sit in on a rehearsal. What happens when we open the doors and no one comes in? What happens when we move outside and people walk by or come after the event is over? How do we find the balance in being the church when and where folks need us to be and still be true to our own needs? When do we stop waiting for a committee on interpretation and simply go and be the body of Christ?

flu and floods

It's been quite the week in Texas with schools closing and people washing their hands in mass hysteria. OK, I'm a little cynical about this whole H1N1 not quite but may be pandemic. I wish someone would test a theory. If we reported on cases of Cancer for one week that were diagnosed AND that people actually died of. If we reported for one week on the cases of HIV/AIDS that were diagnosed and those that died. How much more striking would the statistics be? How advanced would the conversations on cures and vaccines become in just one week. I don't mean to strike unrealistic comparisons, I realize that neither Cancer nor HIV/AIDS are air-borne highly contagious diseases, but they are taking huge amounts of life away from really wonderful people in this world. Even in these cases, panic is not the answer. My brother really said it best in his post on this subject.
Panic was not the answer at my church this morning when congregants arrived to half the building (including the room that the service I coordinate worship in) closed. We combined services as fans and wet-vacs howled at the other end of the building, unbeknown to some until it was announced in church. The church is a wonderful body of people not a building. Today was just another day of proof. As we live lives in ministry that often includes building campaigns, sharing space and change may we always remember that building or not, the church is the church because of the people.

Love for All

to JC..To JC! Cheers

Shot glass that says “Give us a shot,” handed out at bars by Cross Point United Methodist Church in Bondurant, Iowa. Unfortunately all you get is the glass, so you still have to pay for what’s in it.

church marketing

two words I am not fond of being together. love to hear your thoughts, mine are still forming.

A new W in Dallas

They say our current president and family are moving to the 'mountainous' Dallas area. (we're not Kansas but we do our skiing in Colorado for a reason) I attended the installation service of Bishop W. Earl Bledsoe to the North Texas Annual Conference. I know nothing about him other than the bios that can easily be googled. I did however like his presence at worship this afternoon. I have to admit, I mostly went because I love worship. I love to see how people address pomp and circumstance. What is being done to connect an African American man born in 1950 with the population of Dallas and a denomination on the edge of division, loosing members and at a dire lack of young adults. Other than the college choir that was performing and the Bishop's children I don't know that I saw another person in their 20's in the room. I'm sure there were a handful spread among the room, but that's all. I wonder why? Why is the church not popular to our twenty-somethings? I know it is a historical issue and not just our generation, but why? The music was wonderful, the sermon kept my attention, there was an effort to incorporate children and dance. Where are the other church addicts? Where are my friends from seminary who created more opportunity for worship b/c Sunday Church and Tuesday chapel wasn't enough? So, Bishop W. Earl Bledsoe, I heard you and I do believe that in some way I hear what you hear. But, do you hear what I hear? A screaming silence in the absence of people like me.

aesthete

I made the ugliest looking deviled eggs yesterday for a church party. Against all my wants to hide them in my fridge and take something else to the potluck or turn them into egg salad, I didn't. I finished them even though I had to reboil the eggs and still barely got the shells off. I couldn't count how many times I've boiled and deviled eggs in my life, I don't know what happened. It seemed like such a fail-safe. I want the food I take to social events to be perfect, what self-respecting Food Network addict wouldn't. I took them, the nineteen or twenty remaining halves of the original dozen eggs in all their misshapen, nicked and a little brighter yellow center than normal glory. I even left two whites empty in honor of my brother, though I don't think anyone ate them. In the end, people ate them and enjoyed them. No one shunned me for my less than perfect looking eggs. I don't think anyone even noticed. I brought home 3 halves, but that is only because they were victim of being that one dish that gets forgotten in the fridge till the serving is half over. I guess I taught myself a lesson in its not looks but what's inside.

being the new girl

It's like the night before the first day of school. I'm a little nervous. I've been picking out my outfit. I wonder what they'll think of me. Will they like me? Will I fit it? Who will my friends be by the end of the year? Will I say the right thing for the offertory prayer??...well may be that one's a little different. Its funny to sit here and be mildly nervous for tomorrow. I've already worked this week and managed to live, yet this jitters are still here. How unfortunate is it that even in going to a place where love and fellowship are key aspects I am still concerned with what people might think of me. Mostly, this is a passing thought, but my life and society has effected such that I anticipate at least a mild amount of judgement to fill tomorrow (I don't exclude myself from that act either). I know these people are wonderful and will love me, they've already told me so. But no matter how many times we step onto the stage I still get opening night jitters. Part of me hopes I always will. Part of me thinks its all pretty silly.

First Days

I'm just home from my second 'day of work'. This included a few emails from home, dinner with the Praise Band leader and band practice. For two people I am making quite a difference in their lives, I will be taking over many tasks that they don't have the time nor need to be doing themselves. They could not be more excited for my arrival. For the rest, they understand that I am needed and are very welcoming but their lives are not changed much. For me, this is my new world. I am meeting my new social and professional circles. These are the new Abby, Brad, Cynthia, Jessica, Brian, Carrie, Kristi, Minna -s of my world. I believe it was somewhere in the midst of the fourth or fifth time through Los Lonely Boys' Heaven (yes, the praise band will play Los Lonely Boys in church on Sunday) that I had this revelation. My life changed significantly this week and with any luck these people will become some of the more significant in my life here in Dallas, but to each of them today was just another day. How often do we remember those first meetings? How often is someone else's life going through dramatic change right before us and we're just trucking on as normal?

Growing Up

I realized last night that this is my last weekend before I officially begin my career. This is the last weekend of any sort of 'student' life that I might have. What did I do with my last weekend? Well, I was on a JrHigh Mission Trip till now and I preach tomorrow and move on Monday... I guess it could be said that the weekend before Rockdale ROTC was the last of my 'student-like' life, but I didn't realize it then, but do now. I don't know what to do with this information and this feeling. Mostly I don't have time to worry about it..But here it is for now. 10 Years ago at the age of 17 I decided I didn't want to be a gifted and talented education teacher (my dream since before I can remember) and that I wanted to be in Arts Ministry though I really had no idea what that meant. Here I stand (or sit on a guest bed at my parent's wishing I could be asleep) two DAYS from a job in arts ministry. I'm officially a liturgy coordinator. This makes up aspect 1 of a multi-layered container of Arts ministry. Bringing the visual, vocal, experiential elements of the weekly liturgical event is not what I would have told you 10 years ago that I'd be doing now. It is not what I would have told you 10 months ago. I know really my 'career' began years ago with the many paid and volunteer work I did related to this bigger scheme. But this week its really real. I'm doing it..Kelly Williams-Artist in ministry.

an article

Bay Area churches opened door to same-sex vows

Matthai Kuruvila, Chronicle Religion Writer

Sunday, June 15, 2008

Church Bans...

These are another two words that I do not understand their ability to be linked together. In a news report today,
Priest Bans Autistic Boy From Church
Mom Told She'd Be Sent to Jail if She Brought Autistic Son to Church
I do understand concerns of safety, I want to recognize that the truth probably lies somewhere between the comments of the church and those of the family. But, mostly this in one incident within a line of the church bans...you fill in the blank. The church banned colored people, gays...
But these two just don't fit together to me. The people 'the church' tends to ban are exactly the people that Jesus himself worshipped with and taught. He didn't sit up in his suburban pulpit, surrounded by posh facilities and protected by security guards. He hung out on the beach, in the garden and his disciples slept when they were suppose to be keeping watch. I'd love for someone to take up, Jesus wouldn't have had to die if the security had been better in Gethsemane.
As someone who is a part of the protestant church but does not always agree with it, I do appreciate the last line of the article, a quote from the mother. "The church isn't bad," she said. "But it's what some individuals do within the church."

Plenary Witness

The 2oo8 General Conference Proclamation

(click to video link)

We have heard Jesus say – to all persons without exception – “follow me.”

We are part of God’s living body in today’s world, but our United Methodist Church

refuses to accept what God has done,

refuses to keep covenant with its own words in the baptismal promise,
refuses to honor God’s call to professional ministry,
refuses to do no harm,
refuses to open its hearts, minds, and doors.
The unchurched notice. They notice the church
cruelly scapegoating lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people
on the altar of so-called unity The young notice. They notice the church,
refusing, threatening, removing, closeting
the lgbt people who faithfully serve the church. The world notices.We notice.God notices.
The United Methodist baptismal liturgy calls all of us to
accept the freedom and power God gives us
to resist evil, injustice, and oppression
in whatever forms they present themselves.
It is our duty – our baptismal covenant – to stand against the sin of the church,
to stand for God’s freedom and power,
to affirm God’s entire body of Christ that is the church.
We are God's children,
here … now.
Today we boldly declare by standing here
that our church’s doors and our ministries will radically obey the Gospel
that we defy bigotry and ignorance,
that the anti-gay policies and practices of The United Methodist Church are wrong.
By human means we cannot stand
but by the grace of God we can.
By standing
we reject the idea that homosexuality is a sinBy standing
we affirm that sexuality is a good gift of GodBy standing
we affirm our intent to spread God’s love and graceBy standing
we bless and celebrate families, all families.
We do not stand alone.We stand in solidarity with all those
who are not here,
who are not in our congregations.We stand with those who’ve been forced out and who’ve never come in,
who already affirm one another as beloved children of God,
regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity.
We stand with holy boldness
to welcome LGBT laity and clergy into our churches and pulpits, NOW;
to keep baptismal promises for all, NOW;
to affirm calls to ministries for all people, NOW;
to bless covenant relationships in our churches by our clergy, NOW;
to assure membership for all, NOW;
to provide hospitality for all, NOW.
Join us. Stand now. Build our future with hope and trust in God.



Proclamation – Witness – General Conference 2008 – Ft. Worth, TX – Drafted by the Witness Team of Reconciling Ministries Network, Rev. David W. Meredith, Convener

Sing a new Song

I eat my words. "Authorization of a committee to develop the new hymnal came 20 years after adoption of the first official United Methodist Hymnal. " Even if the vote was 450-438 I'm grateful to see us not just think about a new hymnal but working on one. I am extremely curious, almost enough to inquire what the credentials needed to be on the committee to develop the new hymnal are. I'd love to just be a fly on the wall to learn how a new hymnal is developed and witness the discussions. What stays/what's added/what's reworked. I have a deep passion for developing new liturgy and re-visioning that which we have now. With the hymnal being one of our three basic texts for the designing of UMC worship, I would be beside myself to be privy to these conversations in the coming years.

Even half way across the country I feel a positive energy of hope coming out of conference. My skepticism and anxiety as conference began almost a week ago has turned to another reason to wish I were in Texas right now. A dear friend has just returned to say he experienced some of the most spiritually charged moments while doing street ministry that he has ever felt during such an action. May we no longer be remembered for arrests and broken chalices, but for A Future (and Present) of Hope.

Baked Goods and Good ideas Baking

I see evidence of this year's General Conference theme already (in day two) in some of the worships/speeches that I've heard or read notes on so far. (I would like to note, in light of the current political race our outgoing president of the Bishop's council is a woman and our in coming is an African American man, hmm, they co-led the opening worship) Today's comments, "four areas of focus area are: 1) Engaging in ministry with the poor; 2) creating new places for new people and renewing existing congregations; 3) stamping out diseases of poverty by improving health globally; and 4) developing principled Christian leaders for the church and the world." embody Hope with goals that are measurable. I find hope in articulating goals that are attainable and evaluable, especially when there is a need for healing and unification. Some reports and commentary mark our church to be in a stale-mate on many issues and regardless of how many hold that view, being able to point to progress somewhere is at least healing to me. In my recent complaining on the lack of accountability in the clergy system, I'm thankful for dialogue on new models for effective ministry, this gives me hope. I'm worried when back to back headlines read, General Conference to include emphasis on Health and Cookie Bakers fire up ovens for General Conference no one caught the disconnect in that? But would we be Methodists w/o cookies? May be not, but the article says, "100,000 cookies for 1,000 delegates" Maybe this is why we have to have an emphasis on health. Cookies are okay within reason. I'm really not trying be a downer on cookies, I just took a batch of brownies out of the oven myself. But may be we can reflect on some of our bigger problems in attempting to walk off our 100 cookies per person.

Does it take more than an act of God?

I often think that it takes more than an act of God (not that I actually believe there is anything more than an act of God) to enact change in the United Methodist Church. And yet, I remain a member of this body and intend to continue to worship and fellowship within it in hopes of enacting that exact change which I wonder if it is possible. Today begins the first day of our General Conference which happens every four years. With any luck, I hope to blog a lot in the next week and a half about some of the issues on the table or happenings around conference. It is taking place in my home conference, but alas I am in California this spring and not able to attend any events in person. Thus far today I find most interesting two headlines of the day, one a discussion on UM divesting in companies to show support in opposing Israeli settlements in Palestinian land and the other on whether or not it is time to create a new UMC Hymnal. (*update on 4/30 entry) Committees on both came to some directives and will report back at the next General Conference..in four years. Does it really need to take four more years to decide if we need a new hymnal? By the time that decision is made and a hymnal created, approved and published it'll be time to talk about a new one. And, I pray the situation in Palestine will be completely different and for the better in four years. For always, but especially this week, I ask you to join me and many others in praying for this delegation of our church as they make some very important decisions, even beyond hymnals.
You can find all the articles in the links above. Here are some interesting findings from surveys listed in the Hymnal article that I find curious and questionable.
The top three favorites in the current United Methodist Hymnal are "Amazing Grace," "Here I Am, Lord" and "How Great Thou Art."
The top three favorite hymns from The Faith We Sing songbook are "The Summons," "I’ll Fly Away" and "As the Deer."
The top favorite of United Methodists under 30 is "Be Thou My Vision."
The No. 1 requested hymn to include in a new hymnal: "Eternal Father, Strong to Save."
Top three requests to include an updated United Methodist Hymnal or in The Faith We Sing: "Love Lifted Me," "Open the Eyes of My Heart" and "God Bless America."
Others findings indicate that the:
Most frequently sung non-Christmas hymns over the past three years are "Amazing Grace," "Great Is Thy Faithfulness" and "Blessed Assurance."
Most frequent songs from The Faith We Sing are "Shine, Jesus, Shine," "Sanctuary" and "They’ll Know We Are Christians by Our Love."
Ten percent of pastors, worship planners and chief musicians expressed interest in multiple languages in the Psalter.
Thirty-six percent prefer the Psalter as it is now presented, 27 percent prefer not to include the chanting, 38 percent would like Psalms set as hymns and songs.
Seventy-five percent would like to have Healing Services in the hymnal.
The least-used worship service in the hymnal is Word and Table IV, unused by 34 percent.
Forty-three percent want more praise choruses in the hymnal; 34 percent do not.
Seventy percent sing the melodies of our hymns; 61 percent will sing harmony when it is provided.
Seventy percent are comfortable using male-only language for God, 25 percent are comfortable using female language for God, and 42 percent are comfortable using male or female language for God.
Twenty-eight percent prefer to sing lyrics on a screen; 70 percent prefer to use a hymnal or songbook.
Sixty-five percent prefer Wesley texts with their traditional tunes; 33 percent prefer contemporary tunes.

Modern Church Historical

Through my mom and a previous pastor's husband, this link found its way to me today. Especially for my friends who are not blessed with an amazing Christian history class as I am (being an MTS has advantages), here's a little review.

Knowing the Stranger in Our Midst

I'm involved in my school's weekly Chapel planning committee because I'm in a rotation of three to design Sacred Space. In our meeting this week about this morning's chapel this image was a topic of great conversation. Today's chapel service was titled, "Knowing the Stranger in Our Midst" as part of a sermon series titled, "Texts we wish were not in the Bible." Today's text was Genesis 19:1-11, the call of the men of the town into Lot's house for the two travelers to be sent out so they can 'get to know them' one of the 6 clobber texts for GLBTIQ. Though we were bringing into awareness Us vs. Them (othering) of a variety of types, racial, gender, sexuality, religious, etc, the use of this image was challenged and ultimately scrapped. To be replaced by a photo of flowers, several purple and one red. I'd love you hear your reaction to this image. If you find it unsettling, why?
The text from the NRSV:
The Depravity of Sodom
19The two angels came to Sodom in the evening, and Lot was sitting in the gateway of Sodom. When Lot saw them, he rose to meet them, and bowed down with his face to the ground. 2He said, ‘Please, my lords, turn aside to your servant’s house and spend the night, and wash your feet; then you can rise early and go on your way.’ They said, ‘No; we will spend the night in the square.’ 3But he urged them strongly; so they turned aside to him and entered his house; and he made them a feast, and baked unleavened bread, and they ate. 4But before they lay down, the men of the city, the men of Sodom, both young and old, all the people to the last man, surrounded the house; 5and they called to Lot, ‘Where are the men who came to you tonight? Bring them out to us, so that we may know them.’ 6Lot went out of the door to the men, shut the door after him, 7and said, ‘I beg you, my brothers, do not act so wickedly. 8Look, I have two daughters who have not known a man; let me bring them out to you, and do to them as you please; only do nothing to these men, for they have come under the shelter of my roof.’ 9But they replied, ‘Stand back!’ And they said, ‘This fellow came here as an alien, and he would play the judge! Now we will deal worse with you than with them.’ Then they pressed hard against the man Lot, and came near the door to break it down. 10But the men inside reached out their hands and brought Lot into the house with them, and shut the door. 11And they struck with blindness the men who were at the door of the house, both small and great, so that they were unable to find the door. "