11 days...

seem like eternity. I find that when I am sick I forget what it is like to be healthy. I have gone from one sick to another in the last 11 days and I can't seem to remember what it is like to feel good. (no help that medicines for both can cause 'marked drowsiness') To wake up refreshed, be energized and productive all day and go to bed without pain or propping of the head. This has all gotten me wondering how often I've gone 11 healthy days and not even noticed. Not counted at all. How when things are good I take them for granted. I'm learning the hard way how many things I take for granted in life...friendships, health, fitness, nutrition, faith. If 11 days of illness has felt like eternity, what is eternity going to feel like? I think about my friends and family who fight long term disease and still manage to conquer their world. I wonder..would I be strong enough? What if 11 days were 11 months or 11 years...eternity.

How does my heart beat?

church marketing

two words I am not fond of being together. love to hear your thoughts, mine are still forming.

losing a playmate

*Update: shortly after posting this on Nov. 7, Suraja passed away. Thanks to everyone who is caring for her family, friends and those who only know her in spirit and have been praying.

Suraja was hit by a car and I'm told she is dying. She's the one on my left in the photo. I don't want to believe that and I will keep praying that she heals and gets to live out her playful life, spreading InterPlay to the world and mostly Mexico. I first heard the news on Tuesday night moments after my nerves of the election were lifted and joy settled in. What a moment of great joy and great sadness. Over the week the news of Suraja's accident has caused me to think about my relationships. I only new Suraja because we were in an ongoing InterPlay course together (Leadership 1, now Life Practices I think). I wonder about all the times I took for granted an opportunity to learn from Suraja. To listen to her stories about Mexico and how life is different here. How often are there people in my life that I know and care about but still don't give enough time to or the best of me to? Why do I just want to curl up on the couch and sleep in the office right now or continue to write this blog instead of socializing with the three other wonderful coworkers sitting around me? Each in our own little worlds. I mourn that I might never have a chance to play with Suraja again. I hope for a future in which I take more time to play with those around me while they're around.

learning to be proud

After stuffing myself at fauxturkey dinner (a great tradition that should be had by all, but for another post), I found myself in the middle of the Dallas County Democratic Headquarters. We'd been watching the election results at the Fauxturkey Dinner when I saw the quaint arts district four blocks from my house on television, with a big ole' party going on. When we got back to my house Joe and I decided to take a stroll (to help with digestion, mostly) and check it out. Wow. After moving our way through the shoulder to shoulder crowded block party, we found a spot on a sidewalk. I stood there and had a moment. A moment of complete pride. I saw a sea of people. People who were all different and all the same. There was no class, age, sex, race, religion on that block and yet every class, age, sex, race, religion was on that block.
Ever since I had a pastor in a large church say, "What a diverse crowd we had today" And knowing that I could count the non-white folks on one hand, the glbtq on two fingers and the missing generation by a ten year age gap; I've been looking for the time when I stood among a crowd and could say this is an honest- diverse bunch of folk. I saw America, the melting pot, represented in the Bishop Arts District last night. All gathered in a quirky little arts district, folks strolling in and out of galleries and shops, live music, election results projected in all directions and beautiful night skies.
As we returned to my house and not two minutes later Obama was named the 44th President of the United States (yes we missed celebrating with the public masses by 4 blocks and two minutes), I sat proud to be an American. Proud to be an artist. Proud to know that diverse group, mirrored on city blocks across the country had elected our next president, not the white, mostly-male crowd represented in the streets of Phoenix. Every class, age, sex, race, religion elected our president this time. I like change. Today I woke up with hope.

Sexism alive and kickin'

I try not to jump on the feminist soap box, ever, but it seems hard to avoid these days. I build houses for Habitat for Humanity (a truly wonderful organization). It is not uncommon to find a lot of women on the construction site and still a fair number of men taking tools out of their hands or making totally unacceptable comments. I don't understand how people don't realize that referring to sweeping the site as 'women's work' is not acceptable. I'm at an AmeriCorps Habitat for Humanity leadership conference this week. This topic came up today in a session regarding leading volunteers. Obviously, the problem of volunteers not listening or respecting women on the work site is not an isolated event. I was furious to witness the question dismissed with jokes and indirect answers today. I won't rehearse the idiocy of the 90 minute session here. I just want to implore anyone, glbtq young or old, to stand up for yourself. Stand up for what is right. Don't just ignore these acts when you see or hear them. If someone isn't going to stand up for themselves, step in. Don't dismiss your worth for the sake of avoiding an awkward moment. Stop making jokes and face the small comments head on before they expand into bigger problems like Cali's prop 8 (p.s. vote NO).
Okay, thanks for the indulgence, I now pass the box to someone else.

like fabulous yellow roman candles

During the move I found a stack of scraps of paper and a small notebook half full of quotes. These must be quotes that caught my attention in High School and college that I made it around to writing down. I don't know if they're all accredited to the correct people, but here's what I wrote. I think it says a lot about who I am and ways I've grown since my first encounter with these words.
"You will recognize you own path when you come upon it, because you will suddenly have all the energy and imagination you will need." - Jerry Gillies
"Prayers are sometimes answered by the experience of more struggle, by our being plunged into situations where we must risk more than we ever dared before." - "Primary Speech" by Ann & Barry Ulanov
"If everyone thought before they spoke, the silence would be deafening." George Barzan
"To know someone here or there with whom you can feel there is understanding in spite of distances or thoughts expressed - that can make life a garden." Goethe
"The only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say an uncommon-place thing, but burn, burn, burn like fabulous yellow roman candles." Jack Kerouac
"Go for someone who makes you smile because it takes only a smile to make a dark day seem bright. Find the one that makes your heart smile."
"If you don't let your needs be known, you ain't got no bitch."
"If your religion does not change you, then you had better change your religion." Elbert Hubbard
"There is no religion in which everyday life is not considered a prison; there is no philosophy or ideology that does not think that we live in alienation." Eugene Ionesco
"What we need is not the will to believe, but the wish to find out." Bertrand Russell
"He does not believe that does not live according to his belief." Thomas Fuller
"Magic is believing in yourself, if you can do that you can make anything happen." Foka Gomez
"This above all: To thine own self be true. And it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man." Shakespeare
"A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort." Herm Albright
"Faith is a process of leaping into the abyss not on the basis of any certainty about where we shall land, but rather on the belief that we shall land." Carter Heyward
"Faith given back to us after a night of doubt is a stronger thing, and far more valuable to us than faith that has never been tested." Elizabeth Goudge
"So many gods, so many creeds, so many paths that wind and wind, while just the art of being kind is all the sad world needs." Ella Wilcox
"What am I suppose to do, go over there and beg?" "That's why God gave you knees."
"Optimism is the cheerful frame of mind that enables a teakettle to sing, though in hot water up to its nose."
"Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It's already tomorrow in Australia." Charles Schultz
"Religion is a candle inside a multicolored lantern. Everyone looks through a particular color, but the candle is always there." Muhammed Neguib
"God is a comedian playing to an audience too afraid to laugh." Voltaire
"Some of us are becoming the men we wanted to marry." Gloria Steinem
"People take different roads seeking fulfillment and happiness. Just because they're not on your road doesn't mean they've gotten lost." H. Jackson Brown Jr.
"It only take a breeze to fly a kite and it only take imagination to soar an idea."
"Must be able to carry your end of the conversation without a wheelbarrow."
"There are no strangers here, just friends we haven't met."
"Practice random kindness and senseless acts of beauty."
"The biggest disease this world suffers from is people feeling unloved." Princess Diana
"When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, 'I used everything you gave me.'" Erma Bombeck
"The creator of the universe works in mysterious ways. But he uses a base ten counting system and likes round numbers." Scott Adams
"A wise old owl sat on an oak; the more he saw the less he spoke; the less he spoke the more he heard; why aren't we like that wise old bird?" Edward Hersey Richards

Dependent

What makes a person dependent? Over the past few weeks I have spent a lot of time contemplating dependency. As I see it in others - as I see it in myself. I come back to this issue ever few years, it seems. Starting a new 'job' I notice that quite frequently my fellow AmeriCorps and I are wary to make a decision for ourselves. Should we really nail this in? Is it exactly right or close enough? Most of the decisions would not be world ending if they were wrong nor irreversible. Building a house is, when you get down to it, just not rocket science. At what point in time does a person begin to make their own choices and at what points do we cease to be able to function alone. When and why do we become completely dependant on someone else telling us our choice is correct. Why were we at one time able to write in personal journals desperately hoping no one ever found and read them and now our value is found in how many people read our completely public personal blogs. (Guilty myself, I'm counting ya'll) I recall one point in my life when I really struggled with this. My life was so consumed with school, theatre and work obligations that I was completely happy to be dependent upon my significant other at the time to plan my social life. I'm confident I could have created my own social system if need be (and have at times we weren't dating) but at the time, I was perfectly content with letting him. Is it because I knew I was capable myself and made an active choice to depend on him? Is there a good dependency? I like the definition of independent, I believe in most things that is how I'd like to be.

Love Poem

I don't live in California anymore, but this piece is beautiful and I whole-hearted and full-bodied support Vote No on Prop 8.

A new W in Dallas

They say our current president and family are moving to the 'mountainous' Dallas area. (we're not Kansas but we do our skiing in Colorado for a reason) I attended the installation service of Bishop W. Earl Bledsoe to the North Texas Annual Conference. I know nothing about him other than the bios that can easily be googled. I did however like his presence at worship this afternoon. I have to admit, I mostly went because I love worship. I love to see how people address pomp and circumstance. What is being done to connect an African American man born in 1950 with the population of Dallas and a denomination on the edge of division, loosing members and at a dire lack of young adults. Other than the college choir that was performing and the Bishop's children I don't know that I saw another person in their 20's in the room. I'm sure there were a handful spread among the room, but that's all. I wonder why? Why is the church not popular to our twenty-somethings? I know it is a historical issue and not just our generation, but why? The music was wonderful, the sermon kept my attention, there was an effort to incorporate children and dance. Where are the other church addicts? Where are my friends from seminary who created more opportunity for worship b/c Sunday Church and Tuesday chapel wasn't enough? So, Bishop W. Earl Bledsoe, I heard you and I do believe that in some way I hear what you hear. But, do you hear what I hear? A screaming silence in the absence of people like me.

home

Violent squirrels

I would like to know where they passivist squirrels are hiding out and how to get them to move into my neighborhood. I'm not home much, but when I do pull in I'm welcomed by a bombing of pecan shells from above. I don't believe they are simply falling, but coming down at such a force that something (like a feisty squirrel) must have propelled them. First, I am thrilled that a Pecan tree is going to drop its lovely bearings on my front steps and cannot wait for them to be ripe. However, getting from my truck to my front door has become a bit dangerous. I have wondered if they drop all the time and I'm imaging little vengeful squirrels stock piling shells all day then barraging me with them as I dash up the steps. There is a definite Disney Chip n' Dale episode that has given me the fuel to imagine scheming squirrels firing down rains of pecans on innocent me (or Donald Duck). So, today I'm home. I sit on my couch, typing away at the computer and looking out my window to the Pecan Tree and firing area in question. I am not hearing the patter of shells hitting the deck and vehicles below. Why are these squirrels so angry? What have I done? They have plenty of food in the boughs of the great pecan tree. TCU had squirrels like these too. I wonder if they're just equipped with a good shell pitching arm or if they train?

breaking the unbreakable

It is the end of an era. A slightly short toss off the roof missed the dirt by inches and slammed into the sidewalk. At which point the bottom fell into pieces. Nalgene's come and Nalgene's go, but purple Thump and I have been together for some years now. These bottles are apparently giving me cancer anyhow, but nothing beats them even if they aren't truly indestructible. The first week I had this particular bottle I dropped it off a short cliff while climbing and busted the lid strap, which the store gladly handed me a replacement for. The irreplaceable is the memories that come with the bottle. The years that Cam and I had the same. The addition of Thump at an ROTC. Grad school. Enchanted Rock at New Year's. The lingering question is: Do I put the Thump sticker I found while unpacking on the new Nalgene or is that like cloning my dog and thinking its still the same dog?

more potty talk

I began pondering the port-a-potty a few months ago. I was at a Cowboy fast draw event that had two port-a-potties. One was pink, one the traditional blue. Upon closer examination each unit had the respective gendered restroom sign of cultural understanding. The pink woman's room also had a small mirror on the inside of the door, a feature apparently not included on the men's. Is it really necessary to have a separate men's and women's port-a-potty??
My port-a-potty-ponderings have returned in the last couple weeks as I've become a regular of such establishments. This is the restroom of the construction site (all blue w/ no gender specific signs). My curiosity is that the toilet seat has a spring. Not just the lid but the seat. It is in essence the reverse of the "don't leave the seat up" argument. There is no way to leave the seat down. Thus, there really is no squatting if one intends to use the seat b/c the rear must be used to keep the seat down. I have yet to decide the usefulness of this spring feature (on all the potties I've thus far used on sites). Each unit also has a 'urinal'. It does make me wonder why all those folks who keep ragging on others to put the seat down, don't just install the reverse. Install a spring that forces the seat back down. I don't know if one can pee standing up while holding the seat back as one is able to hold it down with the rear end...

when ike grazed dallas

I was building a house. We were loading and raising trusses (the triangles that sit on top of the walls to form the roof) to be exact. I was mentally prepared for some pretty intense wind and rain, so what we did get really didn't seem so bad. Don't get me wrong, its was gusty standing on the wet framed walls holding up trusses and nailing them in. I think it is good for people to get out in a little inclement weather. In some ways I even prefer today to a hot and sunny summer scorcher. A lot of mud and water and I didn't even melt..mom has some explaining to do. I also kept thinking how ironic it was that I spent eight hours building a house in the midst of a storm that was simultaneously destroying so many.

light between darkness

When I left this morning the sun had yet to rise, it was dark. When I arrived back home moments ago the sun had long been set, it was dark. I was tired this morning and I'm a whole new form of tired now. But, in those many hours between the light was great. Not just the Texas sun beating down on me creating a nice set of raccoon eyes and a farmers tan to boot, but the light of people. Arriving on site today (the first big Saturday workday of this AmeriCorps year) there was a mere slab of concrete and a pile of framed walls in the back. Just after four we rode away from a fully framed (plumb and squared) house. Working side by side with Cynthia, the future home-owner, her mom and one of three sons, we began what will by Christmas be a home for one really fine family. Cynthia's 3yr old grandson stole the day when, prompted to do what he does for the ladies, dropped to the dirt ground and starting pounding out all out push-ups. A couple of great and patient volunteers, Walker Texas Framer, Wayne and Dave took extra time to teach the 'newbie' AmeriCorps kids, the sponsors pulled out a fine lunch spread and sent us packing w/ leftover chips and cookies. After a long day of serious work the Tipperary Inn served up a fine finish with cold drinks, new friends and some fancy fiddlin'. If anyone were to say to me today, This world is going to hell in a handbasket, I'd simply have to disagree. If it is, this handbasket is filled with some mighty fine folks.

eidetic

Some moments from today:
For about 24 hours my current AmeriCorps experience was completely unlike my previous year of service. That was until today when we piled into the glorious 12 passenger van. The memories of traveling in vans during youth have been taken over by the many many miles of 10 folks and all our stuff in a 12 passenger AmeriCorps van all over the northeast.
I was schooled by a spry little pregnant woman teaching a step aerobics class tonight. I had flash backs to high school volleyball tryouts as she made us scurry across the floor in squat position. But, as the only 'white' person in the gym I felt a whole lot more at home and comfortable than in a room full of other middle class white woman who I have a lot less in common with. I was again reminded of my first tour with AmeriCorps when we lived in Over-the-Rhine Cincinnati and I attended an African American church and couldn't have been happier, drawn to worship and embraced in community.
This is not just a dear diary moment, but a contemplation on memory and flashbacks. I love a good movie flashback. I love a good life flashback even more. I'm curious today about sense memory. There are so many things I have forgotten, names, places I've been, stories I've told, etc. There are moments I haven't thought of since they occurred. But one duck into a large van and a year of memories came flooding back. It was all I could do to not become the 'my first time in AmeriCorps..." barrage of stories girl today. And through my drenching sweat and aching muscles I rolled through step aerobic moves that I haven't done in at least four years. Muscles remember. Its fascinating. How horrible are we to our bodies (not to mention our minds wasting away in front of computers and TVs) and yet there is so much information stored in them.

aesthete

I made the ugliest looking deviled eggs yesterday for a church party. Against all my wants to hide them in my fridge and take something else to the potluck or turn them into egg salad, I didn't. I finished them even though I had to reboil the eggs and still barely got the shells off. I couldn't count how many times I've boiled and deviled eggs in my life, I don't know what happened. It seemed like such a fail-safe. I want the food I take to social events to be perfect, what self-respecting Food Network addict wouldn't. I took them, the nineteen or twenty remaining halves of the original dozen eggs in all their misshapen, nicked and a little brighter yellow center than normal glory. I even left two whites empty in honor of my brother, though I don't think anyone ate them. In the end, people ate them and enjoyed them. No one shunned me for my less than perfect looking eggs. I don't think anyone even noticed. I brought home 3 halves, but that is only because they were victim of being that one dish that gets forgotten in the fridge till the serving is half over. I guess I taught myself a lesson in its not looks but what's inside.

1-0

It is a great way to start the season. My beloved Horned Frogs have taken down a conference opponent and the Championship bound Sooners are rolling over their opponent of the day as well. While so many things in life change, the sound of football remains constant. Every fall I leave the television on whether I'm in the room or not for as long as there is a game on. The sound of football is like the occasional hymn sing, the sound of carolers at Christmas, waves at the beach. Now with streaming coverage, I get to at least listen to glorious victories of TCU wherever I am. The sound of football floods back memories of home and growing up. We watched (and even apart from each other) continue to watch copious amounts of football. My favorite year was my brother's senior year when I could watch him play on Friday night, college all day Saturday and the Cowboys on Sunday. There is comfort to me in the crashing of helmets and pads, whistles blowing, crowds cheering, the endless drone of announcers.

Change

I don't know if its the Obama folks or the on slot of people from high school 'friending' me on the lovely facebook because our 10 year high school reunion is next summer or my recent move across the country and the start of a new chapter in life that has me thinking about change. One of my high school friends that I'm ecstatic to be in contact with again somehow remembered one of my college entrance essays and asked me to email it to him recently. As it begins, "Toenail polish. My personality materializes through my toenail polish." I'll just let you imagine the rest without rehearsing the 18-year old brilliance ( :) ) of the toe nail polish essay here. (I did get accepted to that school, but did not attend) But it has me wondering how much have I changed in 10 years? There are obvious quantifiable ways and the general evolution of any person in 10 years. But in the deep essence of me, I think I might have really known myself better than I ever realized. The flow and argument of the essay reminds me more of how my brother's thoughts and arguments are organized then my own, which is a topic we should probably both write about another time. I will close with a few more lines from the essay, that I need to remember more now, then may be when I was at that formative 18, "I have a choice to make every second of my life. Choices in life vary from taking the next breath of air, what mood to be in to how to spend my life. The factor that sets me apart from everyone else is that I choose to be me and not anyone else."

Moving Out

I've moved in and out of my parent's house several times..well..at least my stuff has been in and out of their house and I'm around for a couple weeks here and there. Today is another move out. All the stuff..I don't know if the new place is big enough for all this stuff..I know the trailer is not. How does one come to own so much stuff? I've never had my own room at this house. The family moved after I left for college so a lot has been in boxes for years (almost 10). a lot is strewn all around. some has ventured its way to college station and is about to find its way north *couAlexgh*. I don't know what the big blog worthy pondering of this day is..but inside its weird. Its another marking of an end to transitional times. A moment of settling. All the belongings coming back together again. No more excuses for not doing my art b/c half of it is stored somewhere else. No more wishing I had this or that with me. No more packing up three suitcases, throwing them in the back of a truck and the move is over. I have 'stuff' again. Furniture that I own. I'm staying. In Texas. No plane trip to Berkeley for orientation next week...it'll just be another week like last week...

peeps

some folks I know recently let me feed my shutterbug taking pics of them..thought I'd share some favorites...

August? Protector? Romantic?

Where did July go and why did I start and end it with ranting? I did have quite a bit of fun in between. I also took a hiatus from all that was not absolutely necessary..which included blogging. Tonight I come with two happy ponderings.
I drove to Austin last week for my father's Birthday. We had a lot of fun celebrating him. On my way home as I emerged from a cluster of traffic into a 50 mile or so stretch that is pretty desolate there came the lights of a Semi a bit closer than comfort than comfort in my rear view mirror. I moved over and the truck pulled past and in front, then it changed speeds. I'm a cruise control type so I pulled around and sped up enough to put an appropriate distance so the trailers could go their speed and I mine. Then the Semi pulls up the left lane and slides in behind me. Closer than I normally would have liked but it was the Semi's choice so I just kept the cruise on and went about my way. Traveling about 68 down the road the two of us went. I will never know if that truck was using me to track speed, stalking or in its own way protecting. If I had stopped would they have? Would they have helped or hurt? I'm sad that I'd even have to worry. But for all purposes cliche maybe we each just needed somebody else by our side on that dark stretch of empty road. A moment of solidarity? When we reached Dallas the Semi went on East via I-20 and I went home..safe, sound, and thankful for my semi, always in my mind to have been a protector. In fact I missed that Semi on the last bit of my trek, like one misses friends who've stood so close and are now down a different road.

Second, I have a confession. I just finished..by choice (no teeny bopper cousin nor pack of youth group girls making me) watching Picture This! That's not really the confession, but in some way it is. The confession...I like the Cinderella story. Does anyone not? In so many forms, especially when it is well done (Ever After is a favorite version, second to the Disney cartoon). Tonight's version was fun, modern. All the way to the blue dress at the ball. I think this leads to a bigger problem...am I really a romantic? Deep, hiding somewhere? Is this the truth of me? A romantic?? seriously?

another rant of sorts

It is time to get busy when post after post is a rant not of the latest news report, but of my daily encounters in life. I need to cease with the errand running, car fixing, apartment hunt type of life and become again too busy to take care of things and totally consumed in my work so that the actual world does not drive me completely insane. Today I would like to talk about the Dallas rental market and the economic segregation of today. It seems down every street I turn a third of the houses are for sale or lease. I did not expect to see so many houses and apartments on the market. After a week of calling and emailing contact information found on such signs I can tell you why. No one is answering the phone or returning messages. It must be difficult to find a buyer or renter when you're ignoring them! Enough said on that. The economic divide..and I apologize those who've heard this already..I'm a bit struck by it. I've driven at almost random over a fair part of the Dallas area in the last couple weeks looking at properties and neighborhoods that I might fancy myself to live in. I've decided Dallas is the striking example of the rich being richer and the poor being poorer, thus the disappearance of the middle class. The middle class must be in the Dallas suburbs or living in homes beyond their means in Dallas proper. The rich seem to live in pockets surrounded by neighborhoods of the people who serve them - the poor. Unfortunately with this goes a bit of sketchiness and high crime rates. I find it really sad. This is just the observation of a couple weeks of my own house hunting and no solid data but my own experience, so I would love for one more acquainted with Dallas to prove me mistaken. Until then..the search goes on for home sweet home...

a slight rant

I began to blog earlier today and rant about service calls. I'm currently subletting a house and the cable went out last week. My roommate promptly called the cable folks when he got back in town and they scheduled to come out today. Now, I currently work from home, so being around when they came today was no problem, I was going to be sitting here on the computer all day anyhow. My curiosity is more in theory. In the wider world and in 11 out of 12 months of my own life..who can just be at home between 8 and 8 to wait for the cable to be fixed? Really..you can't narrow it down more than that? As I began to blog earlier, around noon, they showed up. What they thought would be a twenty minute stop turned into more than 90 minutes. I can see that this would put a kink in a scheduled day but when all 11 of your 'scheduled' calls are on 12 hour standby. I'd also like to note that while being here I learned that the day of the two service men at my house did not start till 10 and another crew on the walkie-talkie phones didn't start till 11. Why am I on standby at 8am (not that I got up, but I did leave my phone on) if the service workers aren't starting till late morning? Seriously.
I had put this all aside until I just received an email from my student loan company. My student loan company for which I had to go to their site myself to find out that I was already (mind you only 40 days past graduation) past due on my first payment. No late fee-no worries. I'm all paid up now. Watch out for your GradPlus loans fellow students they have NO grace period. So, I laugh to receive an email today that includes the following, "Dear Graduate, Our records show that you may or may not have just graduated. Congratulations and thank you for choosing *** as your student loan partner." *I do actually like my lender so I won't list them here to publicly shame them even though their 'records' seem questionable. If anyone figures out my graduation status and needs me to be on 12-hour standby let me know. Till then, I'd just like to say our service industry needs some help.

Wordle

Thanks, Bruce, I'm recently addicted. This is my resume! How much more fun then the 1 page front and back 10point arial version.

co-opted?

So what really gets me about this is the OneNewsNow news director's comments...

Christian Site's Ban on 'G' Word Sends Homosexual to Olympics
The American Family Association obviously didn't foresee the problems that might arise with its strict policy to always replace the word "gay" with "homosexual" on the Web site of its Christian news outlet, OneNewsNow. The group's automated system for changing the forbidden word wound up publishing a story about a world-class sprinter named "Tyson Homosexual" who qualified this week for the Beijing Olympics.
The problem: Tyson's real last name is Gay. Therefore, OneNewsNow's reliable software changed the Associated Press story about Tyson Gay's amazing Olympic qualifying trial to read this way:
Tyson Homosexual was a blur in blue, sprinting 100 meters faster than anyone ever has.
His time of 9.68 seconds at the U.S. Olympic trials Sunday doesn't count as a world record, because it was run with the help of a too-strong tailwind. Here's what does matter: Homosexual qualified for his first Summer Games team and served notice he's certainly someone to watch in Beijing.
"It means a lot to me," the 25-year-old Homosexual said. "I'm glad my body could do it, because now I know I have it in me."
The article continues...
Fred Jackson, news director of OneNewsNow, tells the Sleuth his organization has now fixed the software glitch. "We took the filter out for that word," he said, without uttering the "G" word.
"We don't object to the word 'gay,'" Jackson explained, except "when it refers to people who practice a homosexual lifestyle." And the "G" word, he says, has "been co-opted by a particular group of people." (People who are g-a-y.)

being the new girl

It's like the night before the first day of school. I'm a little nervous. I've been picking out my outfit. I wonder what they'll think of me. Will they like me? Will I fit it? Who will my friends be by the end of the year? Will I say the right thing for the offertory prayer??...well may be that one's a little different. Its funny to sit here and be mildly nervous for tomorrow. I've already worked this week and managed to live, yet this jitters are still here. How unfortunate is it that even in going to a place where love and fellowship are key aspects I am still concerned with what people might think of me. Mostly, this is a passing thought, but my life and society has effected such that I anticipate at least a mild amount of judgement to fill tomorrow (I don't exclude myself from that act either). I know these people are wonderful and will love me, they've already told me so. But no matter how many times we step onto the stage I still get opening night jitters. Part of me hopes I always will. Part of me thinks its all pretty silly.

First Days

I'm just home from my second 'day of work'. This included a few emails from home, dinner with the Praise Band leader and band practice. For two people I am making quite a difference in their lives, I will be taking over many tasks that they don't have the time nor need to be doing themselves. They could not be more excited for my arrival. For the rest, they understand that I am needed and are very welcoming but their lives are not changed much. For me, this is my new world. I am meeting my new social and professional circles. These are the new Abby, Brad, Cynthia, Jessica, Brian, Carrie, Kristi, Minna -s of my world. I believe it was somewhere in the midst of the fourth or fifth time through Los Lonely Boys' Heaven (yes, the praise band will play Los Lonely Boys in church on Sunday) that I had this revelation. My life changed significantly this week and with any luck these people will become some of the more significant in my life here in Dallas, but to each of them today was just another day. How often do we remember those first meetings? How often is someone else's life going through dramatic change right before us and we're just trucking on as normal?

Growing Up

I realized last night that this is my last weekend before I officially begin my career. This is the last weekend of any sort of 'student' life that I might have. What did I do with my last weekend? Well, I was on a JrHigh Mission Trip till now and I preach tomorrow and move on Monday... I guess it could be said that the weekend before Rockdale ROTC was the last of my 'student-like' life, but I didn't realize it then, but do now. I don't know what to do with this information and this feeling. Mostly I don't have time to worry about it..But here it is for now. 10 Years ago at the age of 17 I decided I didn't want to be a gifted and talented education teacher (my dream since before I can remember) and that I wanted to be in Arts Ministry though I really had no idea what that meant. Here I stand (or sit on a guest bed at my parent's wishing I could be asleep) two DAYS from a job in arts ministry. I'm officially a liturgy coordinator. This makes up aspect 1 of a multi-layered container of Arts ministry. Bringing the visual, vocal, experiential elements of the weekly liturgical event is not what I would have told you 10 years ago that I'd be doing now. It is not what I would have told you 10 months ago. I know really my 'career' began years ago with the many paid and volunteer work I did related to this bigger scheme. But this week its really real. I'm doing it..Kelly Williams-Artist in ministry.

an article

Bay Area churches opened door to same-sex vows

Matthai Kuruvila, Chronicle Religion Writer

Sunday, June 15, 2008

Mission

It occurred to me in a conversation last night that when I refer to ROTC as camp people are not realizing really where I am and what we are doing. ROTC is a mission organization. I will spend two-three weeks of this summer on Jr.High Mission Trips. There is a link to our site on the right column. We're a mission trip that is unique for allowing Jr. High youth to use actual power tools and do construction, part of our system is a Sr. High leadership program and third, we have a strong emphasis on worship (which is where I really fit into the picture). In a board meeting a few months ago, I'm told it was discussed and voted on as to who was the target of our program. Who is this for. For some the answer was obvious -the clients, the folks we are sent into the world to help. But the conversation led to another group and this focus truly guides what we do, which in turn serves so many other groups. ROTC exists for Jr. High youth. They are who this is for. The results of a week prove this intention is being fulfilled. We may significantly touch the lives of our clients, the towns we go to, the churches who host us, our Sr. High and adults. But, we change the lives of Jr.High youth. After one-week there are 11-14 yr olds who have worked harder and had more fun doing it then they could ever imagine. They pay to come and work for a week. But through working, program activities, the community of all ages gathered to serve them and worship whether they stand up on Friday night during our Share Service and articulate it or not, life is a little different after a week of ROTC. I'm proud to be a part of that. On Friday night of this past week, I took my turn on share night and told them that no matter how much the director tells us we're not here for ourselves but to serve others, I say she's wrong. These two-three weeks in a summer remind me why I do ministry the rest of the year.

Reaching Others

Yes, it really is 7:37 in the am and I have been up for more than an hour for the fourth day in a row. As if the mornings were not bad enough already the hour of sleep is not arriving 7.5 to 9 hours prior to the time of arising. This blog actually begins as I sit behind the pulpit and the band leads a game of atom five to stall for breakfast to be ready. A team of adults has now left the room skipping and singing We're off to see the Wizard...I love camp when telling people to do the absolutely ridiculous is completely legitimate and expected really. I love camp when success is marked in the number of people that cry at worship or puke at programs. I love camp when..well I must go join the food line so this shall have to wait. But I guess I do love camp when at 7:40 in the morning I can be so positive about camp. Someone remind me to read my blog about 9:30 when I just want a nap.

MIA

I graduated almost a week ago. Since then I toured the Winchester Mystery house, ate at In n Out several times, went to Indian Rock, packed, ate at Fisherman's Wharf, drove up the coast, walked through a Redwood Grove, went wine tasting, hit the beach, toured Alcatraz, went to the horse races, hugged a lot of friends and moved to Texas. Tomorrow I have a job interview in Dallas and if that goes well will begin looking for a new place to live. Thus, I have been MIA online.

the mark of a friend

I now bear a mark of my dear friend, Abigail King Kaiser, for the rest of my life. She designed and gifted it to me today. She stood by me today, through a lot over the last two years and I have no doubt more than we can imagine in the future. This process has started me thinking a lot about commitment and about friendship. I'm not a big one for commitment, as the post office if no one else can tell you w/my fifteen+ addresses in the course of my 27 years. I don't always move far, sometimes within a mile. But, change is something I'm pretty good at. But, alas I've reached a point in life when commitments no longer come in 1, 2 or 4 year blocks. In many ways I couldn't be more excited. I have found some truly amazing forms to work within and develop a career. So, today I made a permanent commitment. An amazing work of art to mark a special friend, a special time of life and 2 images that are sacred to me-the dancer and the seahorse. I have been blessed with some really amazing people in my life and a lot of them in the years here in Berkeley. People that are heading down a similar road as me, personally and professionally. People that will understand when I'm not all about a mushy good-bye, but enjoying our time together now and looking forward to when our journeys join up again. Thanks for being on my journey.

Church Bans...

These are another two words that I do not understand their ability to be linked together. In a news report today,
Priest Bans Autistic Boy From Church
Mom Told She'd Be Sent to Jail if She Brought Autistic Son to Church
I do understand concerns of safety, I want to recognize that the truth probably lies somewhere between the comments of the church and those of the family. But, mostly this in one incident within a line of the church bans...you fill in the blank. The church banned colored people, gays...
But these two just don't fit together to me. The people 'the church' tends to ban are exactly the people that Jesus himself worshipped with and taught. He didn't sit up in his suburban pulpit, surrounded by posh facilities and protected by security guards. He hung out on the beach, in the garden and his disciples slept when they were suppose to be keeping watch. I'd love for someone to take up, Jesus wouldn't have had to die if the security had been better in Gethsemane.
As someone who is a part of the protestant church but does not always agree with it, I do appreciate the last line of the article, a quote from the mother. "The church isn't bad," she said. "But it's what some individuals do within the church."

Miss Sparkle Sprinkles the Magic

For those that were wondering, this is a great illustration of how my brain often works. Yeondoo Jung took children's drawings and made real life photos from them.

The recorded history of the planet Earth!

"It was a full nine degrees hotter in Oakland than it has ever been on any May 15 in the recorded history of planet Earth, the weather service said." says the SFChronicle. I have been critiqued for writing papers that read like I cut and paste, but this article is a beauty in the area of lack of transitions. Its like it gets a little hot and we are only able to report in one-liners.

A Good Hot Day in California

State Supreme Court says same-sex couples have right to marry
In light of this news being all over town today and the celebration both across the bay and in our own hearts, I want with all my own heart to see the light at the end of this struggle. But what do we see? "Opponents Plot Their Strategy:Critics are confident that California voters will OK a constitutional amendment banning gays and lesbians from marrying." Though our mayor claims that what California does, the nation will follow, all I can do is hope and pray. Mostly I wonder about the infinite number of other issues that the government and tax dollars should be spent on then deciding whether or not people who love each other should be legally recognized as such. (That is not a statement to make light of the importance of equal rights for same-sex couples in any way, I do believe there are wrongs that must now be 'righted') I simply don't understand why the government (or the church for that matter) should have any say in who I am allowed to be in love with in the first place. As a dear friend would say, if we'd all just worry about taking care of ourselves and not so much about other's people's business we'd all be a lot better off. As the newscast I just watched reported, there are $21million of needed sidewalk repair in Oakland b/c people are tripping and falling but only $1million dollar budget to work on the problem. I will claim that it hurts a lot more to trip and fall on the concrete then to live, work and play next to a happily married same-sex couple.

The road to fame

Oh the places a degree from TCU will take a person!

The Art of Finals

I went to get a newspaper this morning because I received an email that I was on the second page today. Weird. I feel divided about this article, because the event was to be about the high school youth and I really would prefer that they have gotten the recognition and their pictures in the paper. We've been going to Berkeley Tech High School once a week for about two months. Talking to students and creating a project to do together. It was decided to have a memorial for their friends/family that have died by acts of violence. We decided that for our portion (as grad students) to paint five chairs each to commemorate contemporary Saints and Prophets. My dear friend and classmate, Abby, blogged about the event with images of her chairs too. Go to Facebook for more pictures.

The full article in the Oakland Tribune can be found here.

The other chairs I created are:

Frida Kahlo:

Cesar Chavez:

Oscar Romero:

Youth Violence:

and as seen in the newspaper, Matthew Shepard:

bad news for sale

Ummm...I'm not really sure what to do with this one. Apparently CNN gets a bad rap for bad headline's so they decided to flaunt it and make it into a Tshirt. The shirt to the left says, "Man dials 911 with his toes." Then has the time stamp on the bottom right. This ties directly in with my class discussion in Theologies of the Body on how a cultural practice is thrown back in the face of one group or another (or both). Like the evolution of tattooing. So, will they now write headlines that make good tshirts, either defeating the purpose of exploiting their bad headlines by a blossoming of catchy phrases or are we in for another bad fashion trend of really dumb shirts?

Plenary Witness

The 2oo8 General Conference Proclamation

(click to video link)

We have heard Jesus say – to all persons without exception – “follow me.”

We are part of God’s living body in today’s world, but our United Methodist Church

refuses to accept what God has done,

refuses to keep covenant with its own words in the baptismal promise,
refuses to honor God’s call to professional ministry,
refuses to do no harm,
refuses to open its hearts, minds, and doors.
The unchurched notice. They notice the church
cruelly scapegoating lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people
on the altar of so-called unity The young notice. They notice the church,
refusing, threatening, removing, closeting
the lgbt people who faithfully serve the church. The world notices.We notice.God notices.
The United Methodist baptismal liturgy calls all of us to
accept the freedom and power God gives us
to resist evil, injustice, and oppression
in whatever forms they present themselves.
It is our duty – our baptismal covenant – to stand against the sin of the church,
to stand for God’s freedom and power,
to affirm God’s entire body of Christ that is the church.
We are God's children,
here … now.
Today we boldly declare by standing here
that our church’s doors and our ministries will radically obey the Gospel
that we defy bigotry and ignorance,
that the anti-gay policies and practices of The United Methodist Church are wrong.
By human means we cannot stand
but by the grace of God we can.
By standing
we reject the idea that homosexuality is a sinBy standing
we affirm that sexuality is a good gift of GodBy standing
we affirm our intent to spread God’s love and graceBy standing
we bless and celebrate families, all families.
We do not stand alone.We stand in solidarity with all those
who are not here,
who are not in our congregations.We stand with those who’ve been forced out and who’ve never come in,
who already affirm one another as beloved children of God,
regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity.
We stand with holy boldness
to welcome LGBT laity and clergy into our churches and pulpits, NOW;
to keep baptismal promises for all, NOW;
to affirm calls to ministries for all people, NOW;
to bless covenant relationships in our churches by our clergy, NOW;
to assure membership for all, NOW;
to provide hospitality for all, NOW.
Join us. Stand now. Build our future with hope and trust in God.



Proclamation – Witness – General Conference 2008 – Ft. Worth, TX – Drafted by the Witness Team of Reconciling Ministries Network, Rev. David W. Meredith, Convener

Hope takes a hit

I don't have words to go with the news today. So I post this photo to represent that I wish this line of solidarity and silence didn't have to exist, but I'll stand in it until it is no longer necessary. For the tragic news: "United Methodists uphold sexuality stance" .

The anti-greying of the church

Another good article out today. The kid I use to take care of, not just a delegate, but leading the delegation from my old conference! I remember electing delegates for 2000 General Conference and campaigning to get a young adult to go. And we did, a female one at that. There's something even more rewarding knowing that opened a door to letting Devin lead this year's troupe, at least I like to think we helped.

Sing a new Song

I eat my words. "Authorization of a committee to develop the new hymnal came 20 years after adoption of the first official United Methodist Hymnal. " Even if the vote was 450-438 I'm grateful to see us not just think about a new hymnal but working on one. I am extremely curious, almost enough to inquire what the credentials needed to be on the committee to develop the new hymnal are. I'd love to just be a fly on the wall to learn how a new hymnal is developed and witness the discussions. What stays/what's added/what's reworked. I have a deep passion for developing new liturgy and re-visioning that which we have now. With the hymnal being one of our three basic texts for the designing of UMC worship, I would be beside myself to be privy to these conversations in the coming years.

Even half way across the country I feel a positive energy of hope coming out of conference. My skepticism and anxiety as conference began almost a week ago has turned to another reason to wish I were in Texas right now. A dear friend has just returned to say he experienced some of the most spiritually charged moments while doing street ministry that he has ever felt during such an action. May we no longer be remembered for arrests and broken chalices, but for A Future (and Present) of Hope.

Two of my life partners

"Delegates to 2008 General Conference were treated to a Texas-sized party April 28 -- their one night off.
A member of the Texas Boys Choir performs during a night of entertainment hosted by the Fort Worth Area.After a concert by the Texas Boys Choir, delegates spilled out onto the Water Park courtyard at the south end of the Fort Worth Convention Center for food, music and fellowship. Visitors from all over the world were treated to Texas delicacies including empanadas, quail eggs and Blue Bell ice cream."

Now here is the combination of two entities that I love dearly, but don't always agree with; Texas and United Methodists. After the sessions I streamed today regarding approval of legislature with financial implications, this was a well-earned gathering of the flock and the herd...

As I was streaming this afternoons sessions I heard a matured but still familiar voice arise. My brother's best friend growing up and a child I often took care of, now 21 and speaking quite eloquently. After a moment, of wow, that was a long time ago (10-12 years) I started to think how interesting it is that so many people I was close to growing up are widely connected in the church. My brother and I were both chairpersons of our conference youth councils, as I believe Devin (the now 21 yr-old) was as well. Had I not been in my last two weeks of Grad School I would have found some way to hang around conference this week. More than half of the articles or sessions include a name of someone I've served with or known along the way. It is this connection, these long-time relationships that embody one of the aspects I love most about being Methodist. It was like pulling teeth to get some of the legislation passed today (I particularly think of the legislation to create a committee to do a study which was quite the ordeal) and I do wonder about the course of change, but I wouldn't give up our connectional system to repair either of these. The fact that I can sit at my computer in California, writing papers and hear familiar voices in Texas, making decisions as elected representatives of my little part of 'the church' (whatever that means) makes me feel truly like a part of the body of believers.

My friends are artists

KIND WOMEN FOR WOMANKIND:

AN ART AUCTION TO BENEFIT WOMEN OF VIOLENCE.
MAY 8, 2008 7 - 9PM HORS DOEUVRES, ENTERTAINMENT, ART!!!

Look for Art by Reena Burton and Abby King Kaiser, but feel free to support anybody! You can bid online too.

Baked Goods and Good ideas Baking

I see evidence of this year's General Conference theme already (in day two) in some of the worships/speeches that I've heard or read notes on so far. (I would like to note, in light of the current political race our outgoing president of the Bishop's council is a woman and our in coming is an African American man, hmm, they co-led the opening worship) Today's comments, "four areas of focus area are: 1) Engaging in ministry with the poor; 2) creating new places for new people and renewing existing congregations; 3) stamping out diseases of poverty by improving health globally; and 4) developing principled Christian leaders for the church and the world." embody Hope with goals that are measurable. I find hope in articulating goals that are attainable and evaluable, especially when there is a need for healing and unification. Some reports and commentary mark our church to be in a stale-mate on many issues and regardless of how many hold that view, being able to point to progress somewhere is at least healing to me. In my recent complaining on the lack of accountability in the clergy system, I'm thankful for dialogue on new models for effective ministry, this gives me hope. I'm worried when back to back headlines read, General Conference to include emphasis on Health and Cookie Bakers fire up ovens for General Conference no one caught the disconnect in that? But would we be Methodists w/o cookies? May be not, but the article says, "100,000 cookies for 1,000 delegates" Maybe this is why we have to have an emphasis on health. Cookies are okay within reason. I'm really not trying be a downer on cookies, I just took a batch of brownies out of the oven myself. But may be we can reflect on some of our bigger problems in attempting to walk off our 100 cookies per person.

Does it take more than an act of God?

I often think that it takes more than an act of God (not that I actually believe there is anything more than an act of God) to enact change in the United Methodist Church. And yet, I remain a member of this body and intend to continue to worship and fellowship within it in hopes of enacting that exact change which I wonder if it is possible. Today begins the first day of our General Conference which happens every four years. With any luck, I hope to blog a lot in the next week and a half about some of the issues on the table or happenings around conference. It is taking place in my home conference, but alas I am in California this spring and not able to attend any events in person. Thus far today I find most interesting two headlines of the day, one a discussion on UM divesting in companies to show support in opposing Israeli settlements in Palestinian land and the other on whether or not it is time to create a new UMC Hymnal. (*update on 4/30 entry) Committees on both came to some directives and will report back at the next General Conference..in four years. Does it really need to take four more years to decide if we need a new hymnal? By the time that decision is made and a hymnal created, approved and published it'll be time to talk about a new one. And, I pray the situation in Palestine will be completely different and for the better in four years. For always, but especially this week, I ask you to join me and many others in praying for this delegation of our church as they make some very important decisions, even beyond hymnals.
You can find all the articles in the links above. Here are some interesting findings from surveys listed in the Hymnal article that I find curious and questionable.
The top three favorites in the current United Methodist Hymnal are "Amazing Grace," "Here I Am, Lord" and "How Great Thou Art."
The top three favorite hymns from The Faith We Sing songbook are "The Summons," "I’ll Fly Away" and "As the Deer."
The top favorite of United Methodists under 30 is "Be Thou My Vision."
The No. 1 requested hymn to include in a new hymnal: "Eternal Father, Strong to Save."
Top three requests to include an updated United Methodist Hymnal or in The Faith We Sing: "Love Lifted Me," "Open the Eyes of My Heart" and "God Bless America."
Others findings indicate that the:
Most frequently sung non-Christmas hymns over the past three years are "Amazing Grace," "Great Is Thy Faithfulness" and "Blessed Assurance."
Most frequent songs from The Faith We Sing are "Shine, Jesus, Shine," "Sanctuary" and "They’ll Know We Are Christians by Our Love."
Ten percent of pastors, worship planners and chief musicians expressed interest in multiple languages in the Psalter.
Thirty-six percent prefer the Psalter as it is now presented, 27 percent prefer not to include the chanting, 38 percent would like Psalms set as hymns and songs.
Seventy-five percent would like to have Healing Services in the hymnal.
The least-used worship service in the hymnal is Word and Table IV, unused by 34 percent.
Forty-three percent want more praise choruses in the hymnal; 34 percent do not.
Seventy percent sing the melodies of our hymns; 61 percent will sing harmony when it is provided.
Seventy percent are comfortable using male-only language for God, 25 percent are comfortable using female language for God, and 42 percent are comfortable using male or female language for God.
Twenty-eight percent prefer to sing lyrics on a screen; 70 percent prefer to use a hymnal or songbook.
Sixty-five percent prefer Wesley texts with their traditional tunes; 33 percent prefer contemporary tunes.

It is not A nor B but the line in between

I learned again today that, particularly, those things, ideas, concepts that I think I have a broad and intentional perspective on are actually quite limited. More on that another time, may be. What I really want to talk about is that concept which was expanded for me today. Transitions. I'm big on transitions. Transitions in worship, in shows, in a day, in moving across the country.... I believe transitions make up a significant portion of our life, but are not given nearly the respect and attention they deserve. Thinking about it now, transition could be added to the list of things inevitable in life: waiting, death and transitions (i think that's suppose to be death and taxes, but I've moved on from there). Transitions in worship are my particular Achilles heal right now. Give me good transitions in a service and even if your message is on another planet, I'll go with you. Muck it all up and you've lost me. How do we open a service, move into a song, into prayer, out of prayer, connected six seemingly unrelated subjects like Oscar Romero, Earth Day, a text we wish were not in the Bible from Joshua, archeology... in one sermon? (That last example was done successively by a Prof. in Chapel today..kudos)
Alas, the bigger picture that makes me want to spew idiotic sounds like yellow cartoons..the life-cycle is one big transition!! Hello. Thank you InterPlay lecture/play! birth is a transition out of death, life is full of transitions that are obvious, death is a transition out of birth/life into ancestors, ancestors are our transition from death of 'life' to birth, birth is our transition out of death... I'm in love. Its an African tradition that my Christian tradition (as noted in class) fits so perfectly in. Thus, if I am so committed to transitions I really need to analyze how I'm taking on this transition between birth and death. Am I tracking or am I mucking it all up?

Modern Church Historical

Through my mom and a previous pastor's husband, this link found its way to me today. Especially for my friends who are not blessed with an amazing Christian history class as I am (being an MTS has advantages), here's a little review.

What flavor do you think it is?

$10,000 for a Child's Birthday Party

Story Highlights
Some parents pay $25,000 for children's birthday parties
Dad reportedly spent $25 million on daughter's bat mitzvah
Minnesota parents organize for simpler birthday celebrations
Frugal mom offers tips on throwing parties for $50

The image to the left is a cake. A $1500 cake for a 10 year old. I would like to say that I don't make judgements, but I do. May be it is something I should work on. I write lengthy essays and fill out long applications just to get $1500 in scholarship money to put towards the more than $40000 of debt just incurred in two years of graduate school. At the same time, I wouldn't mind being hired by any of the above families to design their parties, at least the decor for them. I would like them to hire me, so that in one night of work and a couple weeks of planning I can finance the majority of the rest of my year and be able to work at a much lower rate for non-profit social activism and faith groups. So, I guess I relinquish the right to judge some one's lifestyle by my need for these people to finance my lifestyle. I am in a quandary over it though.

Knowing the Stranger in Our Midst

I'm involved in my school's weekly Chapel planning committee because I'm in a rotation of three to design Sacred Space. In our meeting this week about this morning's chapel this image was a topic of great conversation. Today's chapel service was titled, "Knowing the Stranger in Our Midst" as part of a sermon series titled, "Texts we wish were not in the Bible." Today's text was Genesis 19:1-11, the call of the men of the town into Lot's house for the two travelers to be sent out so they can 'get to know them' one of the 6 clobber texts for GLBTIQ. Though we were bringing into awareness Us vs. Them (othering) of a variety of types, racial, gender, sexuality, religious, etc, the use of this image was challenged and ultimately scrapped. To be replaced by a photo of flowers, several purple and one red. I'd love you hear your reaction to this image. If you find it unsettling, why?
The text from the NRSV:
The Depravity of Sodom
19The two angels came to Sodom in the evening, and Lot was sitting in the gateway of Sodom. When Lot saw them, he rose to meet them, and bowed down with his face to the ground. 2He said, ‘Please, my lords, turn aside to your servant’s house and spend the night, and wash your feet; then you can rise early and go on your way.’ They said, ‘No; we will spend the night in the square.’ 3But he urged them strongly; so they turned aside to him and entered his house; and he made them a feast, and baked unleavened bread, and they ate. 4But before they lay down, the men of the city, the men of Sodom, both young and old, all the people to the last man, surrounded the house; 5and they called to Lot, ‘Where are the men who came to you tonight? Bring them out to us, so that we may know them.’ 6Lot went out of the door to the men, shut the door after him, 7and said, ‘I beg you, my brothers, do not act so wickedly. 8Look, I have two daughters who have not known a man; let me bring them out to you, and do to them as you please; only do nothing to these men, for they have come under the shelter of my roof.’ 9But they replied, ‘Stand back!’ And they said, ‘This fellow came here as an alien, and he would play the judge! Now we will deal worse with you than with them.’ Then they pressed hard against the man Lot, and came near the door to break it down. 10But the men inside reached out their hands and brought Lot into the house with them, and shut the door. 11And they struck with blindness the men who were at the door of the house, both small and great, so that they were unable to find the door. "

My name is America and we have a problem

A rodeo clown's take on healing America in a twelve (edited to 6) step program.

You might need to sit down for this..

Last night I watched part of American Idol by my own free will. I know, what is happening to the world!? This is precisely my question. I remained on the channel my television lit up with when I turned it on because of the subtitle: American Idol Gives Back. I have recently been fascinated by the extreme philanthropic nature of reality television, marked most notably by Oprah's Big Give. I even wrote in one of my class reflections a critique I have of this system in which the upper class employs the middle class to give to the lower class embodying and perpetuating the reliance of all other people on the upper class. In a more questioning sense: Are these shows a reflection of society's growing tendency toward charity or are we using charity to pull on the heartstrings of America to improve ratings and ultimately make money for corporations. By which are we actually helping anyone or just expanding the gap between the rich and the poor? I won't even begin to discuss the ethnic and gender issues I have with all of this.
Another moment of confusion with this particular episode (American Idol Gives Back, aired April 9) was the final moments. What I assume to be this season's remaining contestants filled the stage, all wearing white to sing a powerful version of Shout to the Lord. When did a show titled to embody the complete contradiction of Christianity (creating an idol out of someone other than God) become Christian? Out of all the songs demonstrating a philanthropic nature, why was this chosen? To be even more complicated when Ben Stiller runs out on an empty stage in an empty theatre (in what I again, not being completely up to date with current television, guess to be a parody to the Matt Damon and I believe its Jimmy Kimmel show never having time for him joke). Ben Stiller obviously curses several times, mocks Seacrist and leaves in a huff. How did this little fit help American Idol give back?
I guess my real questions are: What are we promoting in these shows? Who is really benefiting? What messages are being sent? Will television's need to seemingly randomly 'give back' end now that the writers have been back on the job long enough to start up our favorite non-reality shows again?